I think almost every woman I know wishes she felt just a little calmer, a little more centered– less likely to get annoyed at the sound of her husband’s chewing?
OK, maybe that last one is just me.
But if you’re looking for days that feel more grounded it might surprise you to hear that you should actually start with your evenings: a better evening routine to be more specific.
When you create an intentional evening routine, you set yourself up for smoother mornings, better sleep, and a calmer mindset.
The good news is you don’t have to follow some rigid, picture-perfect checklist. I’m talking about an evening routine that feels comforting, achievable, and designed for your real life. So grab your tea, and let’s talk about how to build an evening routine that actually works.
1. Create a Power-Down Hour
If you want a better evening routine, start by setting limits with technology. Yes, we know it’s hard to put the phone down but, we also know that the blue light from your screen delays melatonin, making it harder to fall asleep.
Here’s what helps:
- Set a “screens off” alarm. About an hour before bed, shut everything down.
- Swap scrolling for soothing. Pick up a book, journal, or listen to a calming podcast. We love That Was Us, Girls Night With Stephanie May Wilson and She’s So Lucky.
- Signal your body. Light a candle, slip into your favorite pajamas, or make a cup of herbal tea. These small cues tell your brain it’s time to wind down.
2. Build a Self-Care Sequence
The best evening routines include some form of self-care. I don’t mean complicated 10-step regimens (unless that’s your vibe). I mean rituals that remind you, “I matter.” Below are a few ideas to add to your nighttime self-care routine. Even five minutes of this evening ritual can transform how you feel.
- Wash your face and moisturize.
- Take a warm shower or bath.
- Massage in lotion. Add a layer of your favorite body oil for extra moisture.
- Slip into your softest, coziest pajamas. Treat yourself to the kind that feels like a hug.
- Burn some palo santo or turn on your diffuser. Scent is a powerful signal. We love lavender essential oil
- Stretch or breathe deeply for a few minutes to calm your nervous system.
3. Prep for Tomorrow
A strong evening routine doesn’t just end the day, but it sets up the next one. This isn’t about hustling harder. It’s about giving your future self a smoother start.
- Lay out your clothes. Yes, it really helps.
- Pre-set the coffee maker. Waking up to the smell of brewing coffee is everything.
- Write down your top three priorities for tomorrow. More than three will overwhelm you.
4. Set the Stage for Sleep
Your bedroom is the backbone of your evening routine. If it’s cluttered, bright, or noisy, it’s going to work against you. Ask yourself: “Would I want my best friend to sleep here?” If not, it’s time to make some changes.
Try this:
- Invest in bedding and pillows that feel amazing.
- Use blackout curtains or a white-noise machine if needed.
- Keep your room cool. Ideally, between 65–68 degrees.
- Leave work and laptops out of the bedroom.
5. Choose a Personal Wind-Down Ritual
The best part of any evening routine is the ritual you actually look forward to. This is where you create a moment that’s just for you. Think of this as the heart of your nighttime self-care routine. Pajamas, candlelight, and a good book? That’s not just cozy—that’s grounding.
Some of my favorites:
- Reading a nonfiction book. Think of something that stretches your mind but doesn’t keep you awake with suspense.
- Journaling a few lines to celebrate wins, express gratitude, or let go of worries.
- Sipping tea in bed while a candle flickers.
Spending 10 minutes on a hobby—knitting, sketching, tending to plants.
